Hello from the Marlboro College computer lab. I am at work. I am a lab monitor. These means that for 8 hours a week I work on my Plan in the computer lab instead of in my office. It's pretty good because I have to sit here, whereas in my office I could get up and do something else. But, in general, when I am in here I work on my Plan. Which is good because it's getting to be that time (NOVEMBER) and one had best get one's butt in gear. My butt is in like second or third gear and I really need to kick it up a notch. It might be time to... work more.

Speaking of work, Kate called off seminar today on account of it was tee shirt weather, so I spent the afternoon driving around making pin hole pictures. I am SUPER pleased with the results I got. The camera and I communicate very well. I got a couple of very sweet pictures, and I'm proud to say that in general my exposures were really on. It was really just a wonderful way to pass the afternoon. I will scan my pictures soon. I am applying for senior funds to buy some type 55 polaroid film. Marlboro RULES.

In other news of my week, I went to my first--and I mean first ever--bible study yesterday. My friend Holly is planning to become an episcopal minister and she's the brains behind the bible study group. I'm excited, if aprehensive about it. I am looking for a way to continue to grow in my faith and to be able to talk about faith issues with my peers, which is something that I really loved being able to do when I was at the Rome center. But, I am a little worried because a staff member who described himself as "born again" is joining us, and he seems nice but I am afraid I won't be totally comfortable voicing some of my doubts or questions with him there. Basically, I like my faith life the way it is and I am really not looking to be told that it is bad or that I should drop everything and begin believing a fundamentalist interpretation of the bible. Soooooo yeah. I'm nervous, but I think it is important to do because I don't like that I tend to check my faith at the door when I get to Marlboro.

It was Dan's birthday this weekend! I got him a video game.

The halloween party is this weekend. I'm going to be Leela from Futurama. I'm basically looking at the party as a working event for me, since the rest of November is going to be party central, at least until we get back from Thanksgiving, at which time all partying becomes strictly forbidden as I WILL have a solid draft of my plan paper AND a solid propsal/sketch of my photo project DONE by the end of the semester. I HAVE SIX MONTHS LEFT AND FEBRUARY BARELY COUNTS.

I LOVE daylight savings time! I left the house in a wet-headed fit this morning because I was sure I was late for tutorial only to find that I actually have an hour to drink coffee and let my hair dry and contemplate my existence.

I had a dream last night that I totally rocked out the GRE but then in my dream it turned out I was reading my score wrong, and I actually did not rock it out at all. In fact, I did below-average. It was sort of a stressful dream.

So I will be on time for tutorial, but it hardly matters because due to high winds-- and I mean HIGH winds, along with some snow even though it was sunny-- the power was off for most of yesterday. I managed to print like four pictures but the computer kept going off every time the lights flickered, which was a lot, and then it died all together. Luckily it stayed on at my house long enough for me to get ready for Dan's birthday party last night, which was fun. Our landlady has a gas-powered generator which connects to one outlet in our house, which for some reason is in my closet in my bedroom, but all the same we had a blackout birthday party with music and one lamp. It was cool.

So this was a pretty good weekend, and I got a pretty good amount of work done, yay. The end.

Oh and PS, I am taking the GRE this year but I'm not applying to grad school yet. I don't know what I want to do and it seems foolish to waste the money. I'm going to apply to Americorps and the Rome Center and Teach for America and maybe try to be a nanny or something someplace exotic... or Chicago. I need some time.

A four day weekend is all well and good, but really it just gives me extra time to become brain dead, therefore it takes extra time to get back into a thinking and working place. Today especially was an extremely sundayish Tuesday and I am brainnnn dead. Somehow I thought trying to work with only one arm on my glasses would be effective, but it's sort of just making me feel like, kind of drunk, for lack of a better word. I can't see straight and I can't concentrate. I didn't really do any work this weekend at all and I think the film I shot in Boston and Salem is probably ruined. It was only one roll anyway and it was the camera's fault (the film tore during rewind, I thought it was rewound and opened the back, I'm hoping something will be salvagable, because I felt really on with my shooting this weekend and it's depressing to think of that all being gone).
The weekend was restful. Friday night I went out in Cambridge with Evan and a friend of his and good ol' Frye. We had fun with live music and pool. I like Boston soo much when Evan drives and I don't have to know where I'm going. I was so excited to be in the city, I was entirely full of glee. I was so gleeful that seeing a rat near the Fenway T stop only added to my glee. I was like AWESOME A RAT! I LOVE THE CITY!
Salem is quite a place. The whole halloween thing had commenced this weekend....crowds and crowds of weirdos in downtown Salem. On the commuter rail back to Salem on saturday morning I sat behind a bunch of kids dressed up like harry potter-ites. I was sort of like, um, what does Harry Potter have to do with the Salem witch trials? Potter is pro-witch. It was weird. Dan and I did brave the crowds on Saturday to go to the Peabody-Essex Museum (It's pronounced PEE-bid-ee. I know.) which is a great museum showing off artifacts from Salem's past as a major port and trading center. I love maritime crap, I really do.

In conclusion, life is complicated and sometimes it really wears me out, even vacations.

Current Mood:Ray LaMontagne
Current Music:Ray LaMontagne

Hello, I am better
Kate comforted me on Friday and I had a nice relaxing weekend. Evan and Lydia and Gabe and I went to Metropolis, which is a wine-and-cocktail bar in town on Saturday night and it was a good and much-needed reminder of what life beyond Marlboro is like, or at least can be like.
In tutorial today John said I should be doing more work, i.e. shooting, and that was a good thing. I definitely do need to be doing more work as in Work and I want to very much. So that is win-win.
I already wrote my next Citizen article, about doing community service, so there's no need to worry about that.
Speaking of community service, here's where I do it:

I'm sorry to have to write this, and no one should be worried about me, but I AM NOT A HAPPY CAMPER!

I am A PERSON WHO IS VERY STRESSED OUT AND DISSATISFIED!

I am not doing well IN ANY CATEGORY OF LIFE! Categories include:
1. Health and self-care.
2. Writing.
3. Art (making photographs and books).
4. Inter-personal relationships (not being mean).
5. Housekeeping.

I AM GETTING AN F IN ALL CATEGORIES. I don't know what will become of me. Ok maybe if I do a few more pages of Plan I will feel better but in general this week has been TERRIBLE!

Ok this is probably what I'm doing:

1. Applying to the following in Urban Planning type programs:
a) Cornell
b) Columbia NY
c) UIC
2. Applying to the following for Journalism-type programs:
a) NYU
b) Columbia CC
3. Applying to the following for service/buying-time-to-figure-out-what-of-the-above-I-want-to-do-type programs:
a) City Year (Americorps)
b) John Felice Rome Center
c) Teach for America

Ok.

Get this! I just got off the phone with the principal of the West Halifax elementary school and starting tomorrow I will be volunteering with them! It's a 58-student k-8 school. I'm going to buzz over there right now and check it out. Ok bye!


PS I know my last post was about being flipped out and busy but I think this will be a really cool thing and a great opportunity. Awesome!

So, the time has come for total spazzing.

I am spazzing out constantly. I have nine different calendars on ical to track my classes and obligations (The Citizen, Photography and the book, American Studies Plan Seminar, Tutorial with Kate, Tutorial with John, Topics in Algebra and Pre-calculus, committees, and work. Ok, I guess that's on 8 but I am on three different committees).

After that first initial burst of writing I haven't written anything else, or really done any significant Plan work for days, I wasted the whole weekend baking and being lazy, and now I'm at work but I'm so tired all I want to do is surf the internet. In one week I have to turn in my next book, a portrait book, and of course I'm going to photograph Dan, because I want to and because logistically it makes the most sense, but I don't really want to be "that girl," the one who takes pictures of her boyfriend, I take enough dang pictures of him, but I shouldn't pretend like I don't want to do it of him just because it will be embarrassing. Art classes are really always embarrassing and basically excruciating but making the book will be fun.

And finally, I leave you with this thought: In our product-driven, hygiene-obessed culture, where odor is anathema to everything we believe in, how come no one has marketed pocket/purse-sized air fresheners? For, you know, when you're in a public facility, and you heed the call of nature... you know? This is a million dollar idea! Why isn't this product yet available?!?!



It seems like my life is really out of control, but I think it's actually in control, but I'm not sure. Some things are in control: I have a house and a car and food and a job and a boyfriend and I am in college and soon I will have a degree. That's all fine. Some things are out of control: I don't feel creative enough, I don't feel like my Plan is important or that I have an original idea, I don't think I drink enough water, I am not on a diet. These things are not that important.

In conclusion: I wish it was tomorrow and I was watching LOST. Thank you and goodnight.

So, the time has come for total spazzing.

I am spazzing out constantly. I have nine different calendars on ical to track my classes and obligations (The Citizen, Photography and the book, American Studies Plan Seminar, Tutorial with Kate, Tutorial with John, Topics in Algebra and Pre-calculus, committees, and work. Ok, I guess that's on 8 but I am on three different committees).

After that first initial burst of writing I haven't written anything else, or really done any significant Plan work for days, I wasted the whole weekend baking and being lazy, and now I'm at work but I'm so tired all I want to do is surf the internet. In one week I have to turn in my next book, a portrait book, and of course I'm going to photograph Dan, because I want to and because logistically it makes the most sense, but I don't really want to be "that girl," the one who takes pictures of her boyfriend, I take enough dang pictures of him, but I shouldn't pretend like I don't want to do it of him just because it will be embarrassing. Art classes are really always embarrassing and basically excruciating but making the book will be fun.

And finally, I leave you with this thought: In our product-driven, hygiene-obessed culture, where odor is anathema to everything we believe in, how come no one has marketed pocket/purse-sized air fresheners? For, you know, when you're in a public facility, and you heed the call of nature... you know? This is a million dollar idea! Why isn't this product yet available?!?!

This weekend it rained in a big way, so I made pie.