1. I am single, for the first time in a year and a half, my first serious relationship was wonderful and now it is over.
2. I am doing my Plan.
3. I am living in the middle of nowhere, VT
4. I am graduating and have no concrete plans except for moving out of 623 N. by September 1st, with vague overtones of a Masters in Urban Planning.
And yet, I am wonderfully content. I have everything I need right now in the form of Helena and Evan, my Plan, my iPod, and myself. So what if my grip on sanity is as tenuous as they come, I am totally ok with that.
Wednesday, February 28
Monday, February 26
Sunday, February 25
I have accomplished several things this week.
1. First, there was going to Boston last weekend. That was A BLAST and very good for my soul.
2. Then, there was me being a responsible car owner and getting all kinds of new things for Tobey--like new oil, wiper blades, and a brake light. Tobey is no longer scolding me with "help meeeeeee, help meeeeee" dashboard lights, and all is right in my automotive world.
3. Yesterday Helena and Lily and I went to Northampton, which is such a great town! We resisted going into the antique store, and that was very good of us.
4. I FINISHED MY SLA APPLICATION. It is in an envelope on my desk right now. I put two stamps on it for good measure--a SUPERMAN stamp, because I would be SUPER at this job, and a LOVE stamp because I would LOVE the job. So let's all say some prayers.
5. There were like 8 Marlboro students at (episcopal) church this morning. It was really cool.
6. Arcade Fire on SNL = so amazing, so joyful.
1. First, there was going to Boston last weekend. That was A BLAST and very good for my soul.
2. Then, there was me being a responsible car owner and getting all kinds of new things for Tobey--like new oil, wiper blades, and a brake light. Tobey is no longer scolding me with "help meeeeeee, help meeeeee" dashboard lights, and all is right in my automotive world.
3. Yesterday Helena and Lily and I went to Northampton, which is such a great town! We resisted going into the antique store, and that was very good of us.
4. I FINISHED MY SLA APPLICATION. It is in an envelope on my desk right now. I put two stamps on it for good measure--a SUPERMAN stamp, because I would be SUPER at this job, and a LOVE stamp because I would LOVE the job. So let's all say some prayers.
5. There were like 8 Marlboro students at (episcopal) church this morning. It was really cool.
6. Arcade Fire on SNL = so amazing, so joyful.
Monday, February 19
Proust Questionnaire
1.Your most marked characteristic?
I am almost never calm.
2.The quality you most like in a man?
Kindness.
3.The quality you most like in a woman?
The ability to not take herself seriously.
4.What do you most value in your friends?
Loyalty and patience.
5.What is your principle defect?
I hold grudges.
6.What is your favorite occupation?
Photographing when I know I'm seeing things right.
7.What is your dream of happiness?
Enough money to be able to travel and to share beautiful experiences with friends and family.
8.What to your mind would be the greatest of misfortunes?
To hurt a loved one through selfishness.
9.What would you like to be?
Rich and Thin. (Caitlin's answer, and one that I cannot improve upon)
10.In what country would you like to live?
A United States in which everyone is fed, educated, and allowed to see a doctor for free.
11.What is your favorite color?
Blue
12.What is your favorite flower?
Peony
13.What is your favorite bird?
blue heron
14.Who are your favorite prose writers?
F. Scott Fitzgerald, James Joyce, and for Plan stuff, Peter Bacon Hales.
15.Who are your favoite poets?
T. S. Elliot
16.Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
William Miller and Billy Costigan
17.Who are your favorite heroines of fiction?
Elizabeth Bennett and recently, Ginny Cook from A Thousand Acres
18.Who are your favorite composers?
Mozart and Yann Tiersen
19.Who are your favorite painters?
Magritte and Caravaggio
20.Who are your heroes in real life?
My parents
21.Who are your favorite heroines of history?
Jane Jacobs
22.What are your favorite names?
Sophie, Aidan (It's not my fault these names are super-trendy right now)
23.What is it you most dislike?
Again, Caitlin had it right--Bullshit in all forms.
24.What historical figures do you most despise?
George W. Bush, whoever I can blame for racism in America
25. What event in military history do you most admire?
I guess probably D-Day, but I don't know much about military history.
26.What reform do you most admire?
The Constitution of the United States
27.What natural gift would you most like to possess?
I wish I was more naturally kind and friendly to everyone.
28.How would you like to die?
Old and wise.
29.What is your present state of mind?
I am sort of at my wit's end, frankly, but that has more to do with lack of sleep and post-Boston letdown than anything else.
30.To what faults do you feel most indulgent?
Lying
31.What is your motto?
I don't think I have one.
I am almost never calm.
2.The quality you most like in a man?
Kindness.
3.The quality you most like in a woman?
The ability to not take herself seriously.
4.What do you most value in your friends?
Loyalty and patience.
5.What is your principle defect?
I hold grudges.
6.What is your favorite occupation?
Photographing when I know I'm seeing things right.
7.What is your dream of happiness?
Enough money to be able to travel and to share beautiful experiences with friends and family.
8.What to your mind would be the greatest of misfortunes?
To hurt a loved one through selfishness.
9.What would you like to be?
Rich and Thin. (Caitlin's answer, and one that I cannot improve upon)
10.In what country would you like to live?
A United States in which everyone is fed, educated, and allowed to see a doctor for free.
11.What is your favorite color?
Blue
12.What is your favorite flower?
Peony
13.What is your favorite bird?
blue heron
14.Who are your favorite prose writers?
F. Scott Fitzgerald, James Joyce, and for Plan stuff, Peter Bacon Hales.
15.Who are your favoite poets?
T. S. Elliot
16.Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
William Miller and Billy Costigan
17.Who are your favorite heroines of fiction?
Elizabeth Bennett and recently, Ginny Cook from A Thousand Acres
18.Who are your favorite composers?
Mozart and Yann Tiersen
19.Who are your favorite painters?
Magritte and Caravaggio
20.Who are your heroes in real life?
My parents
21.Who are your favorite heroines of history?
Jane Jacobs
22.What are your favorite names?
Sophie, Aidan (It's not my fault these names are super-trendy right now)
23.What is it you most dislike?
Again, Caitlin had it right--Bullshit in all forms.
24.What historical figures do you most despise?
George W. Bush, whoever I can blame for racism in America
25. What event in military history do you most admire?
I guess probably D-Day, but I don't know much about military history.
26.What reform do you most admire?
The Constitution of the United States
27.What natural gift would you most like to possess?
I wish I was more naturally kind and friendly to everyone.
28.How would you like to die?
Old and wise.
29.What is your present state of mind?
I am sort of at my wit's end, frankly, but that has more to do with lack of sleep and post-Boston letdown than anything else.
30.To what faults do you feel most indulgent?
Lying
31.What is your motto?
I don't think I have one.
Friday, February 9
Monday, February 5
Sometimes I get so incapacitated by love of my Plan that I just want to lie on the floor and think about Ideas and not read or write or make pictures at all. Sometimes the love is like writer's block. It's a more thrilling writer's block. But it really feels like love. I get butterflies in my stomach and feel the need to tell other people about things that they don't care or want to hear about. I want to gush and gush and not make any progress at all.
I have been in this state since roughly 1 o'clock this afternoon.
I have been in this state since roughly 1 o'clock this afternoon.
I'm trying to be philosophical about the whole football thing. New experiences are to be welcomed, right? Even new experiences that feel sort of like being hit in the face. I really almost cried. A lot of people came to my party though.
Speaking of being hit in the face, I was! I with a broom! While playing broomball! It was awesome. I am so hardcore I just shook it off and went right back to actively not scoring goals. Broomball was so, so fun, even if my team, The Raptor From Jurassic Park Flesh Eating Virus, did not win or score a goal. Goals are hard, and things that are hard are not as much fun as things that are easy. Not scoring is surprisingly easy.
I am in love with my new tiny clip on ipod. It is so wonderful. It's the size of... hm... what is it the size of... like 3/4ths the size of a paper matchbook and just about as thick. It's a good consolation prize for not winning the superbowl.
There's always next year!
Speaking of being hit in the face, I was! I with a broom! While playing broomball! It was awesome. I am so hardcore I just shook it off and went right back to actively not scoring goals. Broomball was so, so fun, even if my team, The Raptor From Jurassic Park Flesh Eating Virus, did not win or score a goal. Goals are hard, and things that are hard are not as much fun as things that are easy. Not scoring is surprisingly easy.
I am in love with my new tiny clip on ipod. It is so wonderful. It's the size of... hm... what is it the size of... like 3/4ths the size of a paper matchbook and just about as thick. It's a good consolation prize for not winning the superbowl.
There's always next year!
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